Epic Failures Can Be Redeemed

None of us can live without failure. What defines us is how we recover from our low points. At our rock bottom, do we turn toward God and delve deeper into community, or do we isolate ourselves? Today, Nate Larkin joins Gary Wilkerson to talk about how we can choose a better path in the middle of our failure.

None of us can live without failure. What defines us is how we recover from our low points. At our rock bottom, do we turn toward God and delve deeper into community, or do we isolate ourselves? Today, Nate Larkin joins Gary Wilkerson to talk about how we can choose a better path in the middle of our failure.

Gary Wilkerson: Hey, I'm back with Nate Larkin. Nate, you have written this amazing book called Samson and the Pirate Monks. Samson is in the title of your book and the groups. The story you tell in the book of Samson and David. Do you mind unpacking that a little bit for us today [crosstalk]. I think that's so important. I know we touched on community being important but that just gives us the story of the Bible about the difference in the impact.

Nate Larkin: I remember Samson from color illustrations of Edgar Meyer's family Bible storybook that my dad read from every morning during family devotions. To me, as a kid, he was really the ideal man. This guy with the fabulous physique and the great hair, the guy who was invincible in battle and irresistible to women. I remember thinking, someday I want to be like Samson.

Samson, he really was a messianic figure in the Bible, he's a major biblical figure. Four entire chapters of the book of Judges are devoted to his story that we know far more about him than we know about many others that are listed in the roll call of faith. His birth was announced by an angel, first to his mother and his father and it was a time when Israel was under domination by the Philistines and needed to deliverer so God sent Samson.

Samson grows up knowing that he's there to be a hero and a deliverer. He starts out in this amazing way where he kills a thousand Philistines in one day. Nobody had ever done anything like that. The Philistines were so terrified and the Israelites were so electrified that on that day Samson became the leader of Israel and the Bible says that he went on to judge Israel for 20 years. As far as we know, he did a decent job.

He's the leader of Israel on all matters, civil, military and religious, but Israel is under the domination of the Philistines and the Philistines at this point actually are maintaining this superiority with a very strict policy of gun control. They've made it illegal for the Israelites to own metal in any form. Anyway, Samson is a guy who shows up for work at 9:00 and clocks in and does his job and clocks out at night, for all we know he did his job, but after five o'clock Samson had this habit of disappearing.

He would roam in the neighborhoods of the Canaanite villages looking for trouble and excitement and female companionship. At the age of 40, the wheels came off for Samson. He's in the bedroom of a Philistine girlfriend, a woman who's already betrayed him twice. You'd think it would have dawned on him that this is not a good relationship but he really at this point thinks he's bulletproof. She finally extracts from the secret of his great strengths, shaves his hair and then wakes him up, "Samson, the Philistines are upon you." So Samson gets to his feet to discover that his fabled strength has fled.

They overpower him, bind him with chains, gouge out his eyes and take him to a prison where they put him to work serving their god, the god of grain. There Samson is in the dark, walking in circles, in chains, doing the same thing every day, no hope of escape. Then one day like a miracle the door to that room opens, they take him out of the prison, they take him some distance away to a great temple where there's a festival underway. The Philistine equivalent of Mardi Gras, the cream of Philistine society is there.

He can hear the crowd as they approach the building, the roar that goes up as they bring them in to ridicule him and Samson feels this surge of hope, this last chance to redeem his failed life. With the help of an unsuspecting young boy, he finds his way to the two pillars that formed the central structural support of the building. He breathes a quick prayer to God, pushes the pillars apart, the building collapses.

The Bible says that Samson killed more Philistines in his death than he killed in his entire life but yet, Samson died a failure. When Samson died, the Philistines still ruled Israel. Some years later, not that many, God sends another deliverer. No angels this time, nobody suspects that the youngest son of Jesse is anything special till he's anointed by the visiting prophet. Like Samson, David enjoys spectacular early success against the Philistines, but then he goes on to do what Samson had never been able to do.

He actually defeats the Philistines, establishes the free and independent state of Israel with secure borders. He establishes a capital in Jerusalem. He leads a great revival in worship. David is a warrior. He's a poet. He's a musician. He's a king. He's a great man. In about 40 years old, the wheels come off. He's alone in the city, hasn't gone with the army into the field for the spring campaign, happens to be on his roof when it's bath time for the neighbor lady, catches a sight that lights a fuse and within days, he's committing adultery and then covering up that sin with murder.

We've got two great men, two great failures. After their failures, the lives of these two men go in different directions. Samson dies in enemy territory alone and a failure. David actually recovers. David actually goes on to become a better man and a better King. He dies surrounded by family and friends and he leaves a legacy. Why? I'm convinced it's because… David recovered because he had learned to do the things that make recovery possible. Samson didn't recover because he'd never learned to do those things.

Four simple ways in which their lives are different, and I think they account for their different ends. First, Samson was a loner and David had friends. Here's Samson. He's this major biblical figure. We have so many stories about Samson. The Bible does not give us the name of a single friend. In fact, the only woman that is named, the only associate aside from his family, that is named is Delilah, the woman who betrays him. Aside from that, Samson doesn't have friends because Samson doesn't need friends. Samson is Samson. Samson is the strongest guy he knows.

David is different. He begins his life alone, a lot of time in solitude in the fields tending his father's sheep but everything changed for David on the day that he killed Goliath. That's the day that he met Jonathan. The Bible paints the scene. Here's the headless giant lying dead, the Philistines in full flight, everybody's high fiving around the young hero, and then off to the side stands Jonathan, the crown prince, next in line for the throne.

If Jonathan had any sense at all, he would have begun at that step to begin to take steps to isolate and eliminate David but instead, he does something entirely different. He approaches David. The first thing he does is he takes off his armor which is to say he's defenses. He gives his armor to David and then he takes his sword and his knife and his bow and his arrows, things that David could hurt him with, gives those to David too. Then on the basis of that vulnerability, he offers a friendship.

David and Jonathan formed a friendship that day that will save their life on more than one occasion. They formed a covenant, a bond that outlives them both. That becomes the first of many friendships for David. The names of David's friends fill up pages of the Bible, his 3, it's 30 it's 300. He surrounds himself with losers, with desperados, with debtors, and with giant killers and heroes greater than himself, and together they do what one man could never have accomplished.

Here's the second difference between them. Samson is roamer and David is a home builder. Samson, the Bible gives us many scenes of Samson's life but really no domestic ones. We don't see him at home hanging out with guys. We don't see him with the family. He's out, usually behind enemy lines. He's in enemy neighborhoods, almost always alone. He does amazing things but he does them all by himself.

It's striking to see the difference in the stories, of scenes from David's life. We see a couple of times when he's alone but only a couple, almost always when we see David if he's out, he is either in the middle of a throng or the head of one. Interestingly, the first thing that David did when they captured Jerusalem was he built a house for himself there, a fine home, suitable for entertaining friends and building a family.

David was home when he fell. Samson could have cried out for help when he fell but it wouldn't have done any good because nobody knew where he was. When David fell, he could see home and home could see him. Home could see he was in trouble. Especially, one very good friend named Nathan who was able to come and confront him. Another way that the two are different. Samson was a man of very few words and David lived out loud. Here's the amazing thing, in the Bible, all the major characters pray a lot.

Have you ever noticed that? They sing and they pray a lot, these big long repetitive prayers. We've got Samson, we got four chapters. One prayer that desperate God help me seconds before he died. Aside from that, Samson didn't talk to God. Samson really didn't talk to other people. Samson kept it all in here. He was emotionally constipated but he was a strong silent type, that was Samson, all in here.

David was different. From the time he was a kid, he sang to God and excerpts from his compositions and his journals make up most of the largest book of the Bible which he gave to Israel as their songbook. Here's the amazing thing when you read the Psalms, more than half of the Psalms are laments. I was surprised to learn that because when I was growing up, the Psalms that we sang were only the happy triumphant ones. We didn't sing about God has betrayed me, God kill my enemies and their children. Whatever David was feeling, he said, he lived out loud.

Gary: I like that.

Nate: I think Samson was blind long before they took his eyes. David lost his sight briefly after looking into that blazing fire of lust but he regained his sight because David really wanted to see. The final difference between the two is that Samson made the big plays and David made the little plays. Samson did… had feats of conquest and bravery and strength that have never been duplicated. Nobody else has killed 1,000 Philistines in one day.

Nobody else has picked up the gates of the city and walked off. That's the kind of stuff that Samson did. That's why he had that surge of hope at the end of his life because he knew he was behind but he thought he could come back. He'd always been able to come back on his own. Now, David was different. David only killed one Philistine on his first day but David killed the right one. David was tempted toward the grand gesture.

We're told that toward the end of his life he sitting in his house one day, he's playing with his grandkids. He's looking around. He's just so grateful for all that God has restored and all the blessing on his life. Suddenly, it dawns on him that he's living in the finest house in Jerusalem and God doesn't have a house. All God has is that box they used to carry around the desert. David thinks that's not right. God deserves the best house in Jeru-- God deserves the best house in the world. That's what I'm going to do.

I'm going to build the best house, he gets so excited. He calls the architects, they design this great temple. He starts ordering building materials from around the world.

Then at some point, he takes the idea to God and God goes, "No, thanks but no thanks. It's not a bad idea of the temple, but you're not the guy to build it. Your son can build a temple. What you can do is go spend time with your boy." That's all it took.

David shut the project down immediately, laid everybody off, put all the materials in storage and went and spent time with his boy. I was 42 years old when it suddenly dawned on me as I looked into the face of a very angry wife, that my childhood dream had come true. I had become Samson. I was a gifted guy. I had some promise but I was living in the dark, walking in circles. I was in chains. I was blind. If there was going to be any hope for me, I was going to have to a) admit I'm Samson and b) somehow find a way to learn to live like David.

Gary: What a beautiful, profound, wise and life-transforming. If we listen to that story that you're telling now, it'll make a big difference. Nate, thank you so much. I'm really honored that you spent the time with us here today.

Key Questions from the Podcast

  • How can we overcome our failures?
  • What role does community play in redeeming failure?

Notable Quotes from the Podcast

We've got two great men, two great failures. After their failures, the lives of these two men go in different directions. Samson dies in enemy territory alone and a failure. David actually recovers. David actually goes on to become a better man and a better King. He dies surrounded by family and friends and he leaves a legacy. Why? I'm convinced David recovered because he had learned to do the things that make recovery possible. Samson didn't recover because he'd never learned to do those things. – Nate Larkin

The Bible says that Samson killed more Philistines in his death than he killed in his entire life but yet, Samson died a failure. When Samson died, the Philistines still ruled Israel. – Nate Larkin

David begins his life alone, a lot of time in solitude in the fields tending his father's sheep, but everything changed for David on the day that he killed Goliath. That's the day that he met Jonathan. David and Jonathan formed a friendship that day that will save their life on more than one occasion. They formed a covenant, a bond that outlives them both. That becomes the first of many friendships for David. – Nate Larkin

Resources Mentioned in the Podcast

About Nate Larkin

Nate Larkin, the founder of the Samson Society and author of Samson and the Pirate Monks: Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood, grew up as a preacher’s kid. He married his wife, Allie, on the day he graduated from St. Lawrence University, and they headed off toward Princeton Seminary and the ministry.

If you’ve heard Nate’s story, you know his plans didn’t work out so well. He was ensnared by a sexual obsession he couldn’t tame, and the fear of discovery eventually drove him to abandon the professional ministry. It’s a miracle his marriage survived.

After more than two decades of secret and steadily intensifying compulsive sexual behavior, Nate’s nightmare finally ended in a painful collision with reality. Today, he helps overlooked victims of the commercial sex industry – addicted users – find their way back to integrity and the true intimacy that every person craves.

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About Gary Wilkerson

Gary Wilkerson is the President of World Challenge, an international mission organization that was founded by his father, David Wilkerson. He is also the Founding Pastor of The Springs Church, which he launched in 2009 with a handful of people. He has traveled nationally and internationally at conferences and conducted mission ventures such as church planting, starting orphanages, clinics, feeding programs among the poorest of the poor and the most unreached people of the earth. Gary and his wife Kelly have four children and live in Colorado Springs, CO.

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